Opportunities, endless options and the over thinking what I think I should do, how I think others will perceive it and someone dragging my thoughts and what I want to do away from who I am and what makes me, well me I guess!
The frustrations of seeing others doing and achieving and feeling what I do must be big and shiny and scary, then four things came to me in one single day.
- Seeing a friend who’s came back from a very much needed trip.
- Watching a friends pro mo video that’s due to go to advert.
- Seeing a new friend who wanted to talk to me about my space hopping challenge.
- An email with “Do what you’ll want to talk to people about around the dinner table in a years time” as their piece of advice.
I’ve been stuck with too many Idea’s and wanting them to be big and amazing, but I’ve grown to learn over this summer that you should always do what you want and what makes you happy, sometimes at all costs.
Never try to be anyone other than yourself, yes it’ll take some soul searching and trusting and believing in you, but then if we don’t place all our trust in ourselves and our abilities what kind of life would we lead? It might take weeks of listening to Motivational speeches or watching adventure films or what ever it is that stirs your soul & motivates you. Doing the little things daily and weekly that make you grow and help you keep promises you make to yourself, that’s self esteem, having the guts to follow through on what you promise your self without anyone else knowing about it.
I’m not saying these things are easy, it’s bloody tough I cannot count the times I’ve wanted to lock myself away and swallow the key because I cannot see the end goal or a way out. But each day we give our self the chance to do something amazing by simply choosing get up, face the day and smile. Don’t underestimate the ability to smile even when everything is crumbling down around you and inside you want to die, a smile can be infectious, its free and you’ll find its so very hard for people to be mad and nasty to you if you greet them with a smile.
You might not realize at the time but being in those darkest places (we all have them) will see you come out a better person it will change you and it’s up to you how you let that effect you and how it shapes (and how you shape) your future. So if you are in that bad place smile in the comfort and knowing that it will get better and things will change, one day it’ll all be a distant and fond memory of how you’ve come to be who you are and where you are right now is not by accident this is what you’ve chosen, its your life, this is your choice you have the control.
As its been passed down to me I shall pass it on a few things I question before making a decision about what next, where to go or even how to get there:
Do what you’ll want to talk to people about around the dinner table in a years time.
You might not have a choice in what happens to you, but you do have a choice how you react to it.
Don’t live your life in expectation of what someone else thinks it should be.